Two Bad Tips and a Write Up

To all my British friends, I love you, I hope you tip well, this story does not apply to you...unless you tip badly.

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I got written up. Anyone want to venture to guess who did it? Yeah, he climaxed. For anyone who hasn't worked in a restaurant, or, who has not experienced the kind of tyranny so typical of Cafe Roman, a "write up" is essentially a written warning that the server and two managers have to sign, acknowledging what the naughty server has done wrong. I had never been written up until this past Tuesday night. And here is why it happened.

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What kicked off my less-than-stellar mood was when I served a man five 7&7's, and his wife two Apple Martini's only to overhear him arguing that she should not tip me on the alcohol after dropping their check. WHY? He was fine tipping me on the food, and yet I do not make that OR bring it to the table (a food runner does). Why leave a tip at all then? Let me pause and impart knowledge: When you tip a waiter (at ANY restaurant) a percentage of that money goes to the bar, the bussers,and the food runners. Now, at Cafe Roman, we actually tip out based on our sales, NOT our tips. So, if you decline to tip me on the $76 dollars of alcohol you consumed, you are SERIOUSLY screwing me over.Now, to continue. Their bill was $189 and they tipped me $20. Huge whomp, but I shook it off and moved on. (I literally shook from head to toe by the computer systems, told myself out loud to shake it off and went to pick-up another table's profiteroles).

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Well, shortly thereafter three young British kids sat in my section. Young meaning I might have done them a huge favor by not carding them, but they definitely looked early-20s tops. They ordered $163 worth of food, drinks, dessert, and when I gave them the check I noticed each of them take it, and then watched as each one's face twisted into its own version of utter perplexity. It was as if they had been handed the math SAT I or something. I honestly had no idea what was wrong (especially since we have gratuity suggestion by percentage on our checks), but I knew it could only be a bad, bad omen.

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Walking past their table, I heard a foreign gentleman lean over and say "Oh no, the gratuity is not included, but it is not an obligation...it is not an obligation." So when I pick up the bill, Icount the money and it is $171. $8 on $163 = BY FAR the worst tip I have ever received in my life. Since I started at Cafe Roman, I've witnessed many servers approach tables about bad tips. Most of them simply ask whether there was a problem with the service, and then segue into an explanation of American tipping standards. I personally never feel comfortable doing that, but this pushed me over the edge. Istill felt weird, and my heart was pounding, so I decided to turn to a manager. And take a guess who was the ONLY manager around...great.

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His reply was, "Well, we work across from Lincoln Center, a place that attracts a whole lot of foreigners...what can I say? You win some, you lose some." It isn't like I was shocked that he wouldn't go out on a limb for me, considering our history and his actual hatred for me. So I shrugged my shoulders and approached the young Brits, on the brink of a panic attack.
"Here's your change, and here's our gratuity guide," was what I opened with. One of the girls, pretty, brown hair, smiled and said "Oh, that was for you!" So I took a deep breath and went for it: "Guys, normally I would never say anything...I had a great time waiting on you tonight, but if you only leave me $8, I'll be paying to serve you. I have to tip the bar, the bussers, the runners and this isn't even enough for that on your check. I'd really appreciate it if you wouldn't mind tipping between 15 and 20 percent, unless you felt there was a problem with the service." They were totally embarrassed and left enough so that now I had 20%, and it was done. So I thought...

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Said manager freaked out, grabbed my arm cappuccinos and all, causing them to spill all over me. "I need you in the back RIGHT NOW." "Ummm, do you think I could drop off what is left of these cappuccinos and ask someone to cover my section, which is full?" I was pissed beyond words. "Fine," he says, "But HURRY!" So he wrote me up claiming that even though it used to be fair game to do what I'd done, that policy had changed in February (while I was in Ghana!), and now doing so was grounds for dismissal. When I pointed out that I'd never been informed of the change in policy upon my return from Africa he snapped "It's in your new employee handbook." Of course it isn't. Asshole (spoken with a British accent).

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So the conclusions I've come to is that foreigners (especially the British with their killer exchange rate) need to abide by our damn rules when in our country. Here is my thing, I'm so not the "WOOHOO AMERICA!" kind of person. But apparently the reason why this policy has been changed and enforced so strongly is because in January at some restaurant, some other poor waiter like myself went ahead and added a 17.5% gratuity onto three French people's bill. They flipped out saying it was completely insulting that he would do such a thing when they knew that gratuity at this particular restaurant was only added for parties of seven or more. Why should that waiter assume they were not going to tip him by an appropriate standard?

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Well, because, nine times out of ten they don't. It's true. I hate stereotypes, but I can personally vouch for this. It isn't only the British, or the French. Last night I waited on a family of five from Alabama. Their check was $225, they left me $25. Bad, but at least it wasn't 5%. One thing Olive Garden does have over Cafe Roman is that it is smart enough to add an 18% gratuity to all tables rather than to allow its waiters to frequently lose money to ignorant tourists who either don't know any better, or tip badly knowing we will assume it is because they are foreign, and they just didn't know...